What's so bad about fireworks?

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What's so bad about fireworks?

I don't understand why fireworks are so illegal. I mean, sure there's kids on in the United States that have blown their hands off or something but that's probably all from carelessness and pure stupidity. Me, on the other hand, am smart and plan things out before I do it. I examine the fuse, what type of firework it is, if it will spin or blow up, and everything else. These others dumbasses just light it and forget to let go of the firecracker or stick their face in front of a rocket after it's lit.

Example of what NOT to do with fireworks.

Fireworks aren't that dangerous and shouldn't be illegal. They're only dangerous in the hands of a complete fool. I take it you're smart because you were acute enough to procession and read my bad ass site so you have to be slightly intelligent. You know that you can't just light a firecracker and hope it doesn't explode. Since I'm a generous person, I decided to show you the chamion way to light a firecracker without blowing your hands away:

Step 1 is probably the most difficult part of this whole thing. But once you have Step 1 done, you're not going to have that much trouble anymore.

Step 2 is a little difficult as well so listen up, noobs.

The final step is the easiest of them all. Follow it carefully and don't make any mistakes.

If you noticed, my technique is very challenging. Only the smartest life forms could even possibly finish number 1. If you can follow those steps, you have yourself the perfect setup for fireworks.

If you haven't noticed, I'VE BEEN SARCASTIC. All you stupid dolts out there who can't follow simple steps such as lighting a firecracker then running away can kiss my ass. I hate you. Anyone can light a firecracker and run! I don't understand how you can blow your hand off. Light it and throw it. What's so difficult about that? I hate people.


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